Celebrity Oops!!

More horrifying than falling into the shark encounter at the Aquarium of the Pacific was Gigi's realization that her waterproof mascara was failing her.

Hotel guests in the lobby of the Biltmore were growing increasingly frustrated as they continued to press the elevator button and no elevator would arrive. Meanwhile, on the 38th floor, Hollywood bombshell and pooped-out party girl Gigi Delani had JUUUUUST about made it back to her suite after an intimate, tequila-soaked get-together for Nicole Scherzinger's birthday in the roof top bar when...

As 75,000 screaming fans shouted wildly during Beyonce's thrilling Superbowl halftime show, cameras caught Gigi Delani in deep REM slumber, splayed out and snoring. The image from the jumbotron flooded media outlets and quickly became a hotter topic than the fact that 'someone' 'forgot' to turn on Kelly Rowland and Michelle William's microphones.

Access Hollywood was first to break the story of the feud exploding between long-time frenemies Gigi Delani and doe-eyed pop tart Katy Perry. Apparently the trouble began when Delani was backstage at a recent Perry concert and decided to start the after-party early by popping the corks on several bottles of Cristal, sent to the singer by George Lopez. When Katy entered her dressing room to change into her finale costume, she was met with the sight of a drunken Gigi, draped over a chaise and eating one of her elaborate costumes, a dress made entirely of brightly colored macaroons. In her defense, Gigi's people stated that she had just finished the no-carb cycle of the 'Six Weeks to OMG' diet and could not be held accountable.

WHO WORE IT BEST? - Taylor Swift stuns in frosted lilac Herve Leger at the Macy’s Glamorama event in Los Angeles. Delani stuns for drastically different reasons in the same designer frock, 'customized' with martini stains, marinara sauce and a cocktail umbrella. Later it was discovered her mismatched Rebecca Minkoff clutch belonged to Gossip Girl star Leighton Meester and the bag was confiscated by security.

Though partygoers were chagrined Gigi had missed the announcement that the pool had no shallow end, they were glad to see she had her priorities straight.

Gigi's vow to stay with strictly juice-based daiquiries quickly gave way to the hard stuff during an in-store event at John Varvatos in West Hollywood. Insiders say the sexy starlet was in good spirits, arriving with Pixie Geldof and Chris Pine shortly after 8pm. But after harsh words with DJ Dawna Montell and an ugly incident involving pork pot stickers and a Filipino caterer, Gigi scurried out a bathroom window and was discovered early the next morning by a group of Mexican children in an inflatable jumping castle in Highland Park.

Italian press reported that mega-star Gigi Delani, in Rome to shoot the March 2013 cover for Vogue Italia, was found in the early morning hours of October 14th, despondent, sitting in theTrevi Fountain, scantily-clad in a lace teddy, an empty martini glass in one hand and clutching onto an ancient marble statue with the other. Gigi's camp flew into damage control mode and flooded Twitter, Facebook, YouTube and all the television entertainment news outlets with the explanation that she was simply scouting possible locations for the photo shoot and that her work ethic was 'an example to us all'. Delani could not be reached for comment.

Culver City police responded to a call from the floor manager of Bed Bath & Beyond about a tense stand-off between mega-star Gigi Delani and all three of the Kardashian sisters which had erupted into full blown mayhem. Customers streamed out the exits as goose down feathers turned the store into a wintry wonderland.

The elevator at the Hollywood Roosevelt hotel opened at approximately 4:14 am and night staff were treated to an eyeful as mega-star Gigi Delani staggered out, scantily clad in a vintage Vivienne Westwood kimono robe and clutching a tumbler of scotch. Her cell phone was pressed against her ear but truthfully, she had accidentally hung up on Kellan Lutz hours ago. Even in her alcohol-induced fog, Gigi realized that exceeding the recommended dosage of muscle relaxers and washing them down with pricey booze was not helping the situation. As she came to rest on a lobby ottoman shortly before blacking out, Gigi thought to herself, 'I hope Kellan forgives me. If only I had…zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.'

Oblivious to recent legislation and common sense, Gigi was furiously texting Mila Kunis, streaming Kimbra on her iPod nano and finishing a box of Junior Mints when she crashed into the base of the neon dog sign at Collar & Leash. The phrase 'TTYL' had never been so prophetic...

I swear to God, where is ... ? Why did I ...? Who ...? OMG did I really ... ?! Where the HELL is my PHONE??!!!!!!

No one could say for sure what time Gigi Delani left Ryan Seacrest and Juliana Hough's holiday booze-fest but around 8 am, Culver City maintenance workers discovered the pooped-out party girl unconscious in a life-size Nativity scene.

Paparazzi ambushed mega-star Gigi Delani as she emerged from a trendy Beverly Hills day spa and the photos were proof positive of recent rumors about a collagen lip injection gone terribly wrong. The photos went viral within minutes and the world let out one big collective gasp.

Description

Gigi regretted her decision to go through the Popeye's Chicken drive-thru on her way to co-chair an event for Greenpeace, honoring dolphin doyenne Hayden Panettiere. Sprinting to the ladies room with seconds to spare, the ashen beauty began an epic journey of sights, sounds, nausea and cramps, ending in a series of violent dry heaves that rivaled a P90X ab workout. An hour later, an exhausted Gigi staggered to the door just in time to hear the announcement that she was being replaced as co-host by Cat Deeley.

Carlos had seen this before: the tragic end to a tragic evening. The sight of superstar Gigi Delani slumped over the bar face down in a platter of hot wings and pulled pork sliders was a familiar one. The twigs, feathers and plastic cutlery in her mane of hair, however, were a new addition to the proceedings. "No bueno", Carlos muttered, as he speed-dialed the phone number laminated and hot-glued to the wall by the phone. Twenty minutes later, Gigi's publicist arrived in his pajamas, a ski jacket and his angry boyfriend in tow. He quickly hustled the boozy starlet into his Audi A4 and disappeared into the cold, dark Los Angeles night.

A virtually unrecognizable Gigi Delani was wheeled into Cedars-Sinai late yesterday afternoon after reports that the beleaguered actress had collapsed while taping a guest-starring role on 'Franklin & Bash'. Rumors ranged from booze-induced kidney failure, an emergency breast reduction/enhancement, a 'prominent mole' scare and something vague about a vaginal mesh. Sources close to the star, however, attributed it to emotional exhaustion following her fifth breakup with Kellan Lutz in the space of a week.

Hoda and Kathie Lee watched in horror as amateur chef Gigi Delani attempted to make red velvet cupcakes from scratch. No one had bothered to ask the startlet if she could cook and the resulting debacle left the studio in shambles and sent Savannah Guthrie to urgent care when she was temporarily blinded by a huge dollop of sour cream frosting.

'Variety' had announced the permanent shelving of Hollywood superstar Gigi Delani's beleaguered film project, "Betrayed by Her Beauty", a proposed 4-hour epic about a small town girl with big dreams who turns to a life of alcohol and prescription drugs after a succession of failed marriages, career disappointments and a debilitating struggle with Restless Leg Syndrome. So attendees were stunned when Delani, holding her head high, arrived at an art exhibition that same evening in downtown Los Angeles. Still, given the circumstances, no one dared tell her that the inventory control tag was still attached to the back of her Cynthia Rowley halter dress.

After a Freedom of Information Act request filed by the Associated Press, the US Olympic Committee released this photo of Gigi Delani on the balance beam at North Greenwich Arena. A spokesperson for the sultry star insisted she was merely attempting to perform a plank to post to her Instagram account after a party thrown for Gabby Douglas and 'probably just fell asleep' due to her volunteer work with the Duchess of Cambridge for the Boy Scouts of North Wales.

The Grammy audience watched in horror as Gigi Delani, joining pal Katy Perry during her fairy tale-themed performance of 'Wide Awake', dangled precariously from a broken swing. Perry was livid, convinced Gigi had pulled the stunt on purpose to steal the spotlight since the mishap had been perfectly synchronized to the words "I'm falling from cloud 9..."

Gigi Delani, looking flawless in Helmut Lang, took the stand as a hostile witness in the Kim Kardashian/Kris Humphries divorce trial and made a mockery of the proceedings by taking 'urgent' phone calls from her agent/manicurist/FedEx, referring to Kim as 'you know, the pretty one' and somehow managing to plug her own upcoming reality special titled 'Gigi Delani: Overexposed!' thirty-one times.

It was 4 am and the weary staff at Hollywood hot spot Torung Thai were unsure what to do about starlet Gigi Delani. The bombshell had arrived with pals Jordan Sparks and AnnaLynne McCord but after trying to revive the pooped-out party girl for nearly an hour, Sparks and McCord had no choice but to leave her facedown in her Pad See Ew.

In Rome to shoot the Fall cover for French Vogue, Gigi Delani took a day off to enjoy a guided tour of the Vatican. Wandering away to find a ladies' room, the Calvin Klein-clad beauty found herself lost in an endless series of corridors, passageways and antechambers, finally emerging into an ornate room crowded with robed clergy. Realizing she'd interrupted the Papal Conclave, Gigi thanked the men for their service, complimented a cardinal on the way he'd tied his red sash and made a hasty exit out a side window.